This year, for work reasons, I have spent a lot of time on digital archives related platforms and have viewed the family information of many important people, including family correspondence (of Ye Rong-zhong,葉榮鐘家書 for example), photographs (such as the family photograph of Lee Tai-hsiang 李泰祥全家福照) and artworks belonging to family members (the stone sculptures of Lin Yuan 林淵的石雕). This year the National Science Council has subsidized the Formosa’s King of Song Hung Yi-feng Virtual Musuem Digital Archives Projectlan , and I also found out that the Hong brothers are making a musical documentary about their father “dad”, upon which I went to interview director Mr. Hung Rong-liang.

When Hung’s third son Hung Rong-liang and his brothers (Hung Rong-hung and Hung Jing-yao) are researching and filming the documentary “Dad” it is as if the three brothers are getting to know their father all over again, as well as getting reacquainted with Taiwan’s rich musical heritage. After finishing the interview I returned home and listened to it, taking notes as I slowly listened. I listened to Hung Rong-liang talk about his father all night long and I couldn’t help but thinking about “dad” and the collecting of memories. 
 

Before my grandfather died no one was interested in his life story, seemingly thinking that it was not necessary for sons or daughters or grandchildren to collect minor matters from the past; another reason was probably also that their curiosity was outweighed by the awkwardness of asking one’s own father questions about his past, the result being that the questions were never asked. I once interviewed my grandfather, asking a lot of questions about when he was a child. In just one hour I became the person in our family who understood what my grandfather had been through more than anyone else (even my grandmother), which was unbelievable. Only after granddad died did my father and other older family members gradually realize the importance of these things and that they need to be gradually re-established with suppressed feelings and closed eyes.  
 

Above photograph: My father practicing karate (the one kicking)

However, even when we know that this thing is important, it’s still really hard to do because we are facing our own fathers. I don’t know why but a characteristic of fathers is that they are really extremely hard to understand and this means they are fated, on a certain level, to be lonely. This is how I see my father and this is how he saw his. Sometimes, I feel that my father contrains himself emotionally so, outwardly, he is a free-spirited character, transmitting a sense of security and behaving self-confidently He always hopes to be a solid as a rock and always in control of himself. Every time I see him put on this act, I laugh to myself because of his childish self-packaging, laughing, while, at the same time, feeling an intimate happiness. But I also feel angry when he won’t admits he is wrong, angry, while, at the same time feeling happy to have this inseparable blood connection to this person. Anyway, no matter how angry I get, he is still my father so, when angry, knowing that he will always be my father, I can be as angry as I want.

In my dad’s photo album there are many pictures that tell stories he has forgotten and that I never knew. Seeing him as a young man, he is no longer so stern and imposing. These photographs have brought me closer to my father. The same applies to my granddad, grandmother, mother and aunties and uncles. Collecting stories involving my family is an important thing for me, proving that this family and our blood relationship really exist. Using Facebook as a metaphor, it’s like every family member has been marked in this or that photo or story.

Photograph on the right: Dad (looking at the camera) in a rowing boat with a friend